Stone Mountain: Coming Full Circle

Stone Mountain - Atlanta, Georgia (Photo does not belong to me)

Last year, I had the opportunity to hike up Stone Mountain located right outside of Atlanta, Georgia.  Prior to the trip, I never imagined how hiking up a mountain could be such a clear reflection of my life at the time.  I was going through a rough patch in life where I was genuinely unhappy and simply kept myself busy in order to keep my mind occupied.  Sure, it worked, but like any other wound that goes untreated, the occupancy only lasted so long. I was in denial and did not allow myself to fully feel the situation because the reality was too hard to face. It honestly felt like I was living in a dense fog that would fade in and out depending on the day.

Today, I am a complete 180 and I am happy to say that everything is so much more crystal clear.  I am at a much healthier and happier place and am so proud for getting here. =) With that being said, I want to share a few things from the hike with you that have finally come full circle - a circle that, at the time, seemed impossible to distinguish its beginning from its end. It is funny how life humbles you.  I hope that as I share these “ah-ha” moments, that you are able to reflect on your own challenges and realize that perhaps the answers have been in front of you all along. 

When life feels like a huge mountain that you feel is impossible to overcome… please remind yourself these five things.


1.  Make the climb for yourself.

A friend and I ready for the hike.

My first piece of advice is to prioritize you. I'm serious too. The reality is that a lot of times, we do not prioritize our own needs because it feels selfish. If you can relate to what I am saying in any way, shape, or form, then you understand the struggle of doing things for yourself simply because it is hard to imagine how the consequences would affect someone else. Let me give you an example... At one time in my life shortly before my hike, I had allowed myself to be such a big part of someone else for a very long time that this person became a big part of my identity. Sure, when things were great, it felt like I was on Cloud 9... but when crap hit the fan - I found myself completely screwed over. It was hard to swallow and things did not make any sense. I was faced with two very hard realities: 1 - I needed to do what was best for me, and 2 - I needed to follow through with it.  In relation to the actual hike up Stone Mountain, I vividly recall being so concerned about someone else's feelings that I completely ignored my own emotional wellness. Obviously I cannot change anything now... but I do want to share with all of you a little secret of mine. The next time you find yourself in front of that big mountain, ask yourself, "Will this bring me peace or will it bring peace to my life?"  If the answer is No - then think twice. Trust me. This simple question will do wonders to your daily decision making.

2.  Breathe and take breaks. 

Here we are stopping to pose for a picture.

It is hard to not find distractions when you are faced with such a big challenge in front of you. The second point I want to make is to remember to simply breathe and take breaks.  It is okay. You do not have to be "on" all the time.  I recall prior to the hike, I was pre-determined that no matter what, I was going to pow it out and not take any breaks until I got to the top of that mountain. I did not even consider the possibility of the beautiful sights I would see along the way, nor the random nice people I would meet. In simple terms, I blocked out my surroundings in order to avoid my feelings and in turn, had tunnel vision. I think back and it blows my mind that I was so mentally distracted and supplemented my unhappiness with materialistic things like getting to the top as fast as I possibly could. Luckily, I was with people who felt the need to take breaks and in turn, made my entire experience a lot more enjoyable. My friends, I challenge you to take a break and give yourself some slack - you are human too. And if for some reason, you find that you can't because stopping would mean you'd have to feel the pain of the situation, then surround yourself around a support system that will provide you with the gentle reminder we all need from time to time. Breathe.

3. Utilize your resources and support system.

It is a lot steeper than it looks!

The previous point leads me to "Ah-ha #3" - which is to utilize your support system and resources. I know that sometimes, we feel as though we want to do it by ourselves. I 110% understand and respect that decision. I just want to keep it short and simple by saying that you are not alone. If and when you feel ready to reach out - those resources and support systems are there and ready to embrace you.  You are on nobody else's schedule but your own... so work off of your own timeline.  For me personally - I found that going up the mountain, I did not need to use the rail but coming back down... my body was GLUED to it the entire time. Lol.  No shame. =) Haha - but really. Sometimes, the people you least expect to be able to understand you as a person, may end up becoming your biggest supporters - so be open hearted and identify that support system, even if you do not utilize it right away.

4. In hindsight, things are not as bad as they seem.

Simply breathtaking.

I remember sitting at the edge of the mountain and looking out at this view. It was a gorgeous day - blue skies with scattered clouds.  While reflecting, I distinctly remember seeing the clouds migrate from region to region across the land... and it suddenly hit me really hard and deep.  To be very vulnerable and honest right now, looking out at the beautiful scenery made my heart feel very heavy. Upon looking out, I noticed that the areas under the clouds looked so dark and gloomy while the rest of the entire land was bright and sunny. For a split second, I felt so sad for those dark areas of land because it seemed so unfair. Then over a span of 5-10 minutes, the clouds slowly danced across the sky and the areas that were once dark and cloudy, were now bright and sunny and vice-versa. I know it seems corny and perhaps a bit goofy, but it made me realize at that moment that "this too, shall pass." In reality - and in hindsight - things are not as bad as they seem even if it may feel otherwise at that exact moment. *Sigh* As you can probably tell, I was really doing some hardcore thinking on the top of that mountain, and this image is a constant reminder to me that in the big picture, everything will be okay. So my message to you, my friend, is that even if things seem impossible right now, take my own epiphany and keep it as a symbol for hope that this too, shall pass for you.

5.  Be present

Yippeee!

The last point I want to make is very simple, but so hard to do - and that is to be present. Yes, it is hard to not think of all the "what ifs" and "whys" but the reality is that nothing can be changed. All you can do is make the best decisions for yourself based on the present. I will warn you that it will be tempting to make bad decisions when times are rough - but I challenge you to stay true to yourself and your values. It will be completely worth it. =) In addition, being in the present includes celebrating the small steps you take every day. In this picture, my friend and I finally made it to the top and were super happy. During that exact moment - I allowed myself to be fully present and am so glad to have this picture that captures the excitement.

Thank you Stone Mountain. Till we meet again...

I know these five points I have made may seem cliche - but I genuinely hope that each of us, myself included, are able to learn from the challenges that life throws at us.  Not only that, but I so deeply want all of you to be the person that you DESERVE to be.  Do not let challenges stop you from being true to yourself. And most importantly, remember that every step you take up this mountain is a step in the direction towards a better, wiser, more beautiful you. Trust me, though hard, the climb is worth it.

Till next time... I leave you with this song that, regardless of your opinions about the artist, holds so true to my experience. =) Yes, sometimes, we will lose in life. Heck, we lose so badly that it literally hurts... but have faith and allow yourself to grow.  Trust me.  Once you make it to where you need to be, everything will become crystal clear.